Dad's Birthday

 

Today would have been my dad's 87th birthday. I did my best to pretend it wasn't. I made myself forget. And then my mother reminded me this afternoon. Now I'm going through shades of guilt. 

I did truly forget that today was his birthday, and so we didn't prepare his favorite dinner. Or maybe I subconsciously did remember. I made fish paprikash last night. (Harcsapaprikas) It wasn't catfish. I didn't make dumplings. Hell, I didn't make a sauce. It was yummy despite of it.

Thinking of someone often is quite different that thinking of them because it is their birthday. I choose to think of Dad often because he impacted my life often. He was my role model. His silent example taught me to be strong. To use my mind. To push through pain. To laugh at myself.

I miss you, Dad. I love you. Thanks for so many good memories. Rest in Peace.