Skip to main content

A Discordant of Dogs: Nail Trim

Do you see that face? Eyes one centimeter shy of a roll? It was that kind of morning.

We had forewarning. I set this nail trim appointment weeks ago. I spent a bit of time mitigating all chances for catastrophic fail. By that, I mean stuffing a pillow behind the front passenger seat and my purse behind the driver's seat in order to prevent asshats from going under them.

The best laid plans of mice and men...

A Discordant of Dogs
We don't have a pack. Rather, ours is a writhing dogmageddon comprised of fur, coughs, screaming, and tangled leashes. Ware the approaching Discordant! It is profane and no thing is left untouched! It is more a violation of sanity". 

Our monthly trip for nail trimming is...interesting? Outrageous? 

Yes.

We have four dogs. Alone, each dog somewhat behaves itself while traveling. Jointly, God help you. All of them want to be on Jeff's lap rather than remain in the back seat. Some of them suspect that we are going to the vet. Jeff's "GET BACK HERSHEY!" punctuates the whines and moans coming from behind us.

The Discordant will eventually settle down. This usually happens about two miles away from our destination.

The Vet
We love our vet. We've been with them since 2005. And they Know. Oh yes. All the world senses our approach and locks its door. But the vet stays open, welcoming, patiently awaiting us.

We arrived to find no other vehicles or patients. It was as if they cleared the schedule to accommodate us.

The leashed portion of this mess pulled me towards grass shaded by a massive maple. What exciting smells! Now is the time to pee and poop, and smell and sniff and hum. They do alright  as we walk towards the building. 

And then we're at the door and the bell dings and the Desecration realizes that we have arrived at a place too holy for their nonsense.

I suppose it's the ultimate Oh shit! moment for most dogs.

Taking them all at once does have benefits. Angus won't scream. Hershey won't bark. Neither wants to be mauled by the other. Not here. Not in a place where bullshit isn't tolerated.

The appointment is over in a blink. Nails trimmed, we retreat back to our car. The Discordant is subdued and deflated. The silence is pure bliss.

Hershey & Zoie


Comments

Popular posts from this blog

The day after Halloween

EXTREME PUMPKIN Alas, Halloween has drawn to a close. We didn't celebrate it (again) nor decorate (again). I'm crushed, to be honest, but I won't let the lack of decorations get in the way of good stuff. Like that rotting pumpkin. This offering is from Extreme Pumpkin. Usually rot is something you want your carving pumpkins to avoid, but this one uses a partially rotted pumpkin to very cool effect. Yep. Totally agree. Nothing can prevent me from enjoying scary movies either. Alright, I can already hear some of you proffering a skeptical reminder that electricity will prevent it. I know. I get it. I also can't ignore the comedy to be found, and the annual events, such as " If Veterans Were In Horror Movies 4 "     Oh my sod! Did you watch the vid all the way? See it? Black Rifle Coffee's The Headless Horseman's Roast ! Buy it or a zombie will steal your ammo.

Hershey Update

c. August 2020   Hershey is home and doing well considering that he was split open from chest to prepuce. We had a scare yesterday - I thought an oblong mass was potentially a herniated intestine. Everything was pronounced OK after a quick stop at the vet's. He's done really well. We have not needed to leash him to deter him from bounding around; he has restricted himself and mostly won't jump off the bed or chair without assistance. I set two poof pillows on my desk in the evening, and he curls up on them while I browse YouTube. It's likely bad for my back to slump with him. He's worth it. 💕

Misdiagnosed

  I fell on the steps again . I ended up on the floor again . Karma . I'm so fucking tired of it. The adventure continued when I lost balance and slid down three stairs. My lower back hit each tread's nosing.  Holy fuck, the pain! I stayed on the floor and rubbed around the scar from my laminectomy, softly crying my eyes out while the dogs pawed at me: You're on the floor! Play with us! No. Just no. The hours crept on. I reached my pain threshold. The ER doctor, Richard Hemdon, is an asshole. I described the accident and my symptoms. Nerve pain. Breakthrough nerve pain. Nerve pain that feels like electricity going down both legs instead of just the left leg. Registering a 9 on my pain scale nerve pain. I asked to have a pain med on board before going to radiology. The nurse brought me a Tylenol extended release, 650 mg. I'd already taken a prescription strength Tylenol. It's a Schedule III controlled substance because, technically, it is an opioid. If the