Surprise: lemon curd!

 

  

 There are days when my mother's antics leave me giggling. 

She bought boots from a dollar store yesterday. We can't try on apparel during the pandemic, so she promptly broke the rules and slid one onto her foot when nobody was looking. Seemed to fit. Into the cart they went. She tried them both that evening and was disappointed to find that they really didn't fit. I left her pacing the foyer and insisting they would have to do. She called me a few moments later to say that these boots fit perfectly... once she removed the wadded up tissue paper stuffed into the toes.

Her age has nothing to do with it. She's always done silly stuff like this. I love her even more for it. The years have slightly dulled her common sense, sure, and she makes the weirdest choices, but she's ten times healthier and more cognitive than her peers.

Yesterday's nonsense carried into today. I opened to fridge to find a jar of lemon curd occupying her shelf.

Lemon curd? In nearly fifty years of my life I have never seen her eat lemon curd. Hopefully she didn't mistake it for pie filling. I was almost afraid to ask.

"G'Morning Mom," I adopt a cheerful smile. "I see you bought lemon curd. That stuff is yummy. What are you going to do with it?"

"Morning. I'm going to eat it on my waffle." She waves a butter knife towards the toaster and I breathe a sigh of relief.

The product itself isn't bad if you aren't a pearl-clutching health nut named Susa*.

Lemon curd is an intensely unhealthy type of topping and spread that should only be eaten rarely, if that. It is heavy in both fat as well as carbohydrates. The calorie content in lemon curd is very high, and this should weigh on your mind significantly before you think of consuming significant quantities of it. - Fitday 

Judas Priest! Will it also come to life and stab me in my sleep? Steal my credit card and download curd-centric porn? 

And a high caloric count? 60 per 1 tablespoon. 

Fitday isn't too far off on the rest. The most basic recipe* calls for egg yolks, fresh citrus fruit, sugar, salt, and butter. These "magic five" are absolutely essential. No substitutions.

I'm pleased to say Mom did purchase a quality product. If you're going to buy any sort of curd, Tiptree is the best. I'm also amazed that our small market out here carries this delicious import.

*Want a basic-and-delicious lemon curd recipe? I recommend Sally's Baking Addiction.